let's talk pickles

Joe: I'm gonna have a pickle. Do you want one?

Me: Not really.

[I watch Joe start eating a pickle and start to salivate. I guess I really do want a pickle. But should I admit it?]

Me: Ummm...okay, sure.

[I eat the pickle and immediately regret it.]

Me: Blech! This pickle is nasty!

Joe: Well, it's a zesty pickle. Why did you buy zesty dill pickles?

Me: Well, you're the one who asked for dill pickles. And when I got to the pickle aisle, there were literally a BOJILLION pickle choices. A bojillion brands. A bojillion flavors. And I knew you only like DILL pickles, so finally after WAY too many minutes spent in the pickle aisle, I picked the first jar I saw that said "DILL" on it. So I guess THAT'S why you got zesty dill pickles!

---

So yeah.

I'm not a communist. I'm not necessarily anti-capitalism either. But COME ON, PEOPLE!! Grocery stores are way too big to begin with and it would make shopping so much more fun and so much easier if there weren't a bojillion choices for everything.

I mean, seriously.

Let's talk pickles.

First, there is the type of pickle. You've got dill pickles, kosher dill pickles, bread and butter pickles, sweet pickles, sour pickles, half sour pickles, candied pickles, gherkins, and (apparently) there are also zesty dill pickles.

There are more types of pickles than what's in that short list, but now let's talk about cuts. There are whole pickles, half pickles, pickle spears, sandwich stackers, pickle slices.

Now, really, it's okay that there are different types of pickles and different cuts of pickles. But, now, to ADD to your pickle choices, there is also the pickle brand to consider. Some of the main brands throughout the United States are Vlasic, Claussen, Heinz, and Cain's. And that's not even 10% of the brands in the USA. Each state has their own list of pickle brands and there are also smaller pickle companies trying to cash in on the pickle market.

Is there really the need for this, though?

I mean, a pickle's a pickle. Maybe there are taste and quality variations from brand to brand, but do there really need to be hundreds of pickle types/cut/brands to choose from?

Really?

Think about it.

the end of the world as we know it

I'm surprised I haven't heard about this before, but apparently there is an organization called CERN that is experimenting with physics in an underground facility at the Franco-Swiss border near Geneva, Switzerland.

From my understanding (bear with me because I'm not scientifically minded)...this Large Hadron Collider they have created is some sort of proton collider whose findings will shed light on particle creation and, in essence, help explain theories such as the Big Bang Theory. And one of the things I've read said that this collision of particles might produce some dangerous results including micro black holes, strangelets, vacuum bubbles and magnetic monopoles. Not sure what those are except for the black holes. Fantastic. We're all going to be wiped out and I learn about the end of the world the day before it's going to happen.

For those of us in America, according to this countdown, this collider will be tested on Friday 08/08/08 (freaky) at 12:00am (Mountain Time), 3:00am (Eastern Time).

They say that the likelihood of something catastrophic happening is very slim, but still.....why do people feel the need to experiment with physics? I mean, due to the fact that something bad COULD happen, they should just leave it alone and start testing theories in a safer manner.

Perhaps I'm being paranoid but, just in case, I want you to know that I love you all dearly and my life would never be the same without you. You will be in my heart for always.

But, if all goes well and there is no end of the universe tomorrow at midnight, I want to get this for myself....



A new Volvo C30. It's soooooooooooo pretty!

and i thought Boston drivers were bad....

Thursday Comment #1
People who live in Phoenix don't know what a rotary is. There is this rotary (ok...technically I guess you would call it a "roundabout") around a fountain on the street right next to the apartment complex. I was driving to the apartment for lunch one day to let Lucy out of the crate for a little while and I was stuck behind a genuis. He enters the rotary. Then I enter behind him. All of a sudden, he stops right in the middle of the rotary to let another car enter the rotary. Are you KIDDING?!?!? You don't STOP in rotaries! To make matters worse...I've seen this happen more than once.

Thursday Comment #2
The biggest douche bag in the universe lives in Paradise Valley and drives a Maserati. Apparently when you are loaded and have a car that costs as much as a 4 bedroom house, driving rules don't apply to you.

Thursday Comment #3
My last day of work is tomorrow. For those who don't know (or don't remember), I've been laid off from my current position due to the terrible economy. The company I was working for mainly worked with partnership marketing for financial institutions in the credit and loan industry. And since the credit and loan industry has been hit pretty badly this year, the business owners have decided to shut everything down. I've started to look for new jobs, but I'm really unsure of what I really want to do. I have a strong desire to be creative, go into publishing or graphic design or something related to the advertising/marketing world. I think that is where I'd be most happy. But I also have a strong desire to actually make money. And in order to continue making what I've been making the past few years, it looks like being an Executive Assistant is the way to go. I'm not really certified for anything else. So it's going to be tough. Do I just settle for something that will enable us to live comfortably or do I go for something I'm really interested in and won't feel like poking my eyes out at the end of each day?

Thursday Comment #4
***POSITIVE COMMENT ALERT! POSITIVE COMMENT ALERT!***
Joe's catheter is gone. Adios. Au revoir. Arrivederci. Sayonara. Peace out. Buh bye. GONE! Not sure if it will happen tonight, but he'll get to go swimming very soon and take a nice long shower with no fear of getting an infection! YAY!!! Dialysis is still kicking his butt and his left arm is like a pincushion, but he's still on the road to getting a nice healthy kidney, thanks to his sister, Jen. What do you do for someone who gives you a kidney? A simple "thank you" card definitely isn't enough. I mean...it's saving his life, in the simplest of terms. It's the most awesome gift ever!

Thursday Comment #5
***SAPPY COMMENT ALERT! SAPPY COMMENT ALERT!***
Joe is amazing. It's been such a tough year for him having to deal with a life threatening disease and having to go through all of the treatment for it. I mean, the choice is easy, really: do the treatment or let your kidneys fail and die. The choice is easy. But it's just a hard thing to have to go through. It's really part of our daily life now, but every once in a while I just wonder "Why him? Why so young?" and I think to myself that he's just such a strong person for going through it so gracefully. I LOVE YOU, JOE!! It's all working out...

$4.15 and counting...

I won't mention anything else about the astronomical price of gasoline other than the fact that seeing nothing lower than $4.15 for gas at every gas station makes me seriously want to hurl.

How are the prices in other parts of the country? New Hampshire folks? California folks?

I have never seen gas prices so high in my entire life! And I'm seriously disgusted by this trend.

green is the new black

After moving back to Arizona and having possibly the worst allergies of my entire life, I have really tried to take the whole "going green" movement to heart. I mean...it's really bad here. I think back in the 80's Arizona was the place to move to because it was GOOD for people with allergies, good for breathing, etc. Now it's the exact opposite, in my opinion. The population has probably more than doubled since then, people are buying bigger cars (that can't even fit into parking spots without hitting something), homes are being built further and further away thus depleting the natural environment, and pollution and allergies are just awful.

There's a sort of "hill" I drive over on the way to work every morning and every morning it's the same view: beautiful Phoenix skyline and vast expanse of the Valley of the Sun blanketed under a brown cloud. It just makes me sick thinking about what is going into our lungs. I'm on allergy meds now, for the first time in my life, so I sneeze and itch less...but I'm still breathing in that crud every day just like everyone else.

It's sad that in order to fully "go green" it is necessary to spend oodles of money. In order to live a "green" life, you'd have to buy everything organic, drive significantly less (which is near impossible in this day and age), buy an eco-friendly car or convert yours for a painfully high price, recycle everything that you can and only buy recycled products, et cetera, et cetera.

I'll tell you what, though...

If I won the lottery tomorrow, I'd recycle my Honda and get one of these cool buys:


the Koenigsegg CCXR which is second most powerful production car in the world and runs on ethanol.

OR, I would indulge in this cute little creation designed in America, manufactured in India and currently being sold in the UK:


Is it called Greeny (also called the G-Wiz...why didn't I think of that?) and is ENTIRELY emissions free. How cool is that?

That's all I got for now.